Lance Armstrong is exactly like Hulk Hogan

I just finished watching most of Oprah Winfrey’s interview with Lance Armstrong, and the imagery from the underbelly of the cycling industry brings me back to those days in the 1980s when all these bloated, gassed up wrestlers on steroids were the norm.

Armstrong, finally forced into a corner regarding his lengthy use of performance-enhancing drugs and blood doping, came clean to Oprah. This is in stark contrast to Hulk Hogan’s 1992 appearance on the popular Arsenio Hall Show, during which he backpedaled about his steroid use. He later recanted those statements in federal court.

Regardless, Lance Armstrong is Hulk Hogan. Granted, Armstrong is on a much bigger scale with more eyes watching, but at their cores, each of these athletes is a persistent liar. And just like nobody believes much of anything Hogan says these days, you also have to doubt every single word uttered by Armstrong.

They both spout off in a way meant to give them an advantage. The often seem to say half-truths in order to distract you from bigger untruths. They both know how to work their audiences. They are both ruthless in protecting their interests.

The irony of the Armstrong developments is that ever since I started watching wrestling in 1981, I’ve heard all kinds of disparaging comments:

“You watch that fake stuff?”

“Those guys are just actors.”

Yeah, I knew it was fucking entertainment within a few weeks of watching it after my parents told me the wrestlers really didn’t hurt each other.

Yet here we are decades later, and you’ve got folks who still believe sports like cycling and baseball are real. Those fans are every bit the marks that wrestling fans are, just like those cyclists and those baseball players are every bit the fakes that rasslers are.

Hogan. Armstrong. The names are interchangeable to me. They’re con men, and even after they come clean, they never stop trying to work you.

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5 comments

  1. Pingback: After 38 years, Hulk Hogan’s wrestling career ends with a slur | Boston Garden Balcony
  2. Joe Lowry

    I have to totally agree on this one. Armstrong and Hogan are no different. We all know the history of the WWF back in the “steroid era.” The reason Vince was able to get away with it for so long is because of the lack of testing and its perception. When Vince had to expand his brand of “entertainment” he had to change the corporate structure as well as licensing. Even though scandals and deaths were at all time high, nobody admitted anything. Not until the company went public and Vince had his machine do away the “bad guys” of the sport. Same with this sport of cycling. Everyone knows in that sport that PED’s are common. The sport itself was not how to win the race but how to master the art of not getting caught. Same with Major League Baseball. Mark McGwire self admittedly used a substance which at the time was not on the list of PED’s. He told the truth to U.S. Congress because he did not use a banned PED substance at that particular time. But he did admit to using the substance during a time in which it was not banned. So the question is, did he lie or did he cheat? I am not here to debate the facts of athletes and PED’s. The court systems are full of those cases now. What I wanted to make clear is that every athlete is competitive. The industry they allow themselves to participate in is competitive. It is only human to want to win and win at any cost. Whats not human is the arrogance of bold faced lying. If you use PED’s, win alot of championships and get caught, then face the music, admit it, then move on. But the echos of Ken Patera always ring in my ears during these debates…”Win if you can, Lose if you must….But always cheat!” Funny how art can imitate life!

  3. bostongardenbalcony

    If Vince back in the day gave you a better push because you had bigger muscles, then it was an advantage — maybe not competitive, but definitely a professional advantage in terms of your ability to earn money. Remember when a young Randy Orton came back from an injury and he had lost some muscle, and Vince was in the ring to interview him and the first thing he said was something like, “Gain some weight, kid.” Even now, 67-year-old Vince looks like he’s gassed up.

    • Steve Viglio

      Yea, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was gassed up. However, personally as a fan, I don’t really care who is juicing. I tend to figure most of them are, especially if guys like Bret Hart were using them back in the day.

  4. Steve Viglio

    For me, I don’t really care if wrestlers are on the juice. It’s different for competitive sports as steroids can give some guys an edge over others, which isn’t fair. In wrestling, it isn’t really like that. The thing I do have a problem with is a promoter like Vince Jr. who loves those physiques and who gives more attention to huge guys over other guys. That pretty much encourages steroid use, which has meant bad effects for guys like Eddie Guerrero.

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